Tu Es Mon Soleil - Chapter 11

Regina pushed the intercom bell of her friend’s apartment building and waited. No answers. She pushed it one more time. Still no answers.

 

“Where are they?” she mumbled in confusion. Well, maybe Ellen went out with Andy, so Portia wasn’t here anymore as well, Regina thought. She drawn out her phone and called Portia. She waited but there were also no answers. Finally Regina cancelled her call and thought for a while. Maybe Portia was at the Small Steps, so it’d be better if Regina just go there.

 

Regina turned around and descended the stairs. She was wondering whether Portia was alright, did Ellen treat her nicely. The last time Regina saw the two of them was 2 weeks ago, Ellen was very cranky and she didn’t seem to make any effort to be nice to Portia.

 

Regina had just stepped on the sidewalk when she saw Portia’s yellow VW Beetle slowed down and stopped across the street. The passenger’s door blasted open and Regina’s eyebrows lifted in surprise when she saw Ellen got off of the car. Ellen walked around the car to the driver’s side and waited while Portia opened her door and got off. Regina could see that Ellen’s hand wasn’t hanging in front of her chest anymore, though it was still bandaged.

 

They walked across the street towards Regina, but still hadn’t noticed Regina’s presence. Ellen said something to Portia and she replied by saying something while fumbling for something inside her handbag. While she was busy looking for something inside her bag, her car’s key dropped to the ground. Without even being asked to, Ellen bowed down and picked it up.

 

Regina was stunned, and then she smiled. Well….. apparently somebody had changed a bit, she thought.

 

“You are really troublesome,” Ellen grumbled while handing back Portia’s key.

 

“Hold it for a sec,” Portia said, still rummaging her bag. “Where is it…..?”

 

Ellen sighed. “Please don’t say you lost my house key.”

 

“I’m sure I’ve put it inside my bag. I’m sure… Ah! Here it is!” Portia looked up and pointed the key to Ellen’s face in victory. Right at that moment, she finally saw Regina and smiled, “Hey, Regina!”

 

Ellen turned her head too. “Oh, you’re already back from San Fransisco?”

 

Regina smiled widely to both of them, and then her eyes were fixed to Portia. “Hello, Portia.” Ellen rolled her eyes and shook her head slowly. “Where were you guys from?”

 

“We just went to the hospital,” Portia replied. “Routine check up. Look, the doctor said that her arm doesn’t need be hung anymore.”

 

Regina looked at her friend. “That’s good news, right?”

 

“If you say so,” Ellen mumbled. “I still can’t move my hand.”

 

“I think you're not supposed to shake your hand like that,” Portia said.

 

“I’m not shaking my hand,” Ellen denied. “I just wanted to show it to Regina.”

 

“I called you earlier,” Regina said to Portia.

 

“You did? Oh, it was you?” Portia asked while pulling out her cellphone. 

 

“Yeah, but you didn’t pick up. I thought you were teaching.”

 

Portia stole a glance at Ellen. “Ellen prohibited me to pick up any phone calls while I was driving. I’m sure that you….”

 

“Of course you can’t pick up any phone calls while you’re driving. After all, you’re not a great multitasker and…” Ellen interjected.

 

“Hey! I’m a great multitasker and I always put my phone on speaker mode when I’m driving. I know that I’m not supposed to hold my phone while I’m driving,” Portia continued her words while glaring at Ellen who glared back at her. 

 

“Okay… Okay…” Regina cut them off with a cheerful tone to prevent any World War when it seemed like Ellen and Portia’s relationship had just got better. “Anyway, Portia, you’re not teaching any class today?”

 

Portia gasped and looked at her watch. “Shoot, I forgot. I gotta go.” And then she looked at Regina and smiled. “Thank god you’re here. You can accompany your friend now. Here,” she said and handed the apartment’s key to Regina.

 

Regina took the key confusedly. It had been weeks since the last time she saw Portia and now after they finally met, she wanted to go just like that? “But, Portia….”

 

But Portia had already turned around and walked to her car.

 

“De Rossi,” Ellen called out.

 

Portia stopped and looked back. “Yeah?”

 

“You forgot something,” Ellen said while showing Portia’s key.

 

Portia laughed shyly and jogged back to Ellen. “Thanks,” she said while taking her key.

 

Before Portia turned around and left, Regina took the chance to ask, “Portia, are you free tonight?”

 

Portia looked at her. “Tonight? Yeah, I think so. What’s up?”

 

“Dinner with me?”

 

Portia smiled. “Sure.”

 

Regina smiled went broad. Oh, she just remembered….. She turned her head to Ellen who stood next to her without saying anything. “By the way, you won’t be needing Portia’s help tonight, right?”

 

Ellen didn’t answer her question right away. She stared at Regina for a while with a strange look on her face, then finally said, “No.”

 

“Awesome,” Portia said and clapped her hand once. “Well, see you tonight then, Regina.”

 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“So,” Regina said while opening Ellen’s apartment door and stepped inside. “Everything’s okay while I wasn’t here?”

 

“As you can see,” Ellen answered shortly.

 

Regina threw herself to the couch and said, “You know your mom is going to be back in New York soon, right?”

 

Ellen walked to the kitchen and said, “Yeah, she already called me before she boarded to the plane earlier.”

 

“She’s going to have a heart attack if she found out about your hand.”

 

“Oh, she already did. I told her and she also has already yelled at me on the phone,” Ellen said lightly. “Hey, what do you want for drink?”

 

“Anything,” Regina answered. “So, what did Betty say?”

 

Ellen walked back into the living room with an apple and a bottle of orange juice on one hand. “Well, she asked me how did I get my wrist sprained. Drink this.”

 

Regina stared at the orange juice in disbelief. “Hey, I’m not a 5 year old!”

 

“She stuffed my refrigerator with fruits and juices. If you don’t like orange, there are still tomato, apple, carrot, and only god knows what else. Look for it yourself.”

 

“She? You mean Portia? Well, orange is fine,” Regina said and shrugged. “So you told Betty about Portia?”

 

Ellen sat on the piano seat and bit her apple. “Nope. I told her I fell from the stairs. And that is true. I did fall from that stairs, after that girl hit me.”

 

“You have to get ready,” Regina said. “I think Betty will get here right after the plane landed.”

 

“I know,” Ellen sighed.

 

“You know, I’m quite happy that you’re not so cynical anymore to Portia,” Regina said with a happy smile on her face. “She’s a fun girl, isn’t she?”

 

“Yeah?” Ellen answered indifferently. 

 

“Oh, come on. Don’t be too hard on her,” Regina chimed. “She just wants to help you.”

 

Ellen mumbled something inaudible and continued to eat her apple.

 

“Anyway,” Regina said and pointed to the row of small plants pots near the living room’s window frame. “What are those?”

 

Ellen turned her head to the pointed direction and answered, “That girl brought those here. She said the plants can get more sun lights here than in her apartment.”

 

Regina turned her head to her friend in full surprise and confusion. “Portia brought those here?”

 

Ellen nodded. “She loves plants.”

 

“And you let her brought them here?”

 

Ellen shrugged carelessly. “She loves plants,” she said it one more time, as though that statement explained everything.

 

Regina blinked several times, and then her eyes went back to the small pots. Portia loves plants? How could she didn’t know that all along? What else did Portia like? Did Ellen know? 

Regina looked back at Ellen and said hesitantly, “Recently Portia has spent more of her time with you here. So I’m assuming that you know more….” She fell silent for a moment, then asked, “What else do you know about Portia?”

 

“What?” Ellen asked back. Confused.

 

“What else do you know about Portia?” Regina repeated her question. “You have to help me, Ellen. It’s been weeks and I’m sure that you must’ve noticed some things about her that I probably don’t. You know I like her, but apparently, I know nothing about her all this time. Did she ever talk about me? How does she think of me?”

 

Ellen raised her right hand, which was still holding her half eaten apple, to stop Regina’s flood of words. Regina shut her mouth up and Ellen stared at her with her furrowed brow. “If you really like her,” Ellen said, “if you really want to know her better, why don’t you ask her directly? You two are pretty close, right?”

 

“I….. I don’t know,” Regina answered frankly. “I mean, I don’t know. Even though she’s always nice to me, I still get this impression that she’s keeping her distance. I don’t have the guts to ask, I’m afraid that I’ll ask about things that I shouldn’t talk about and she'll be more distant to me,” Regina looked at Ellen with bewildered eyes. “I don’t know how to face this.”

 

Ellen stared at Regina for a while, and finally sighed, as if she surrendered. “She’s a dancer,” Ellen said quietly. 

 

“I know that,” Regina cut her off, slightly waved her hand. 

 

“Juilliard’s graduate.”

 

Regina stared at Ellen. “What?”

 

“You didn’t know, did you?”

 

Regina shook her head. How could she didn’t know that Portia was a Juilliard’s graduate? How could she didn’t know about something that big?

 

“She’s a great dancer,” Ellen continued. “But I assume you already know that since you said you’ve already seen her dancing.”

 

Regina opened her mouth, wanted to say something, but drawn her action back.

 

“She loves Italian’s songs.”

“Italian songs?”

“And Italian’s foods.”

“I have to bring her to an Italian restaurant then tonight,” Regina mumbled, more to herself. Regina looked up at Ellen and asked, “What else?”

 

“She…..”

 

“She what?”

 

“Nothing,” Ellen said while standing up from her seat. “Sometimes she can be troublesome. That’s all.”

 

Regina stared at her friend disappointedly. “What? That’s all you could tell me about?”

 

“You’ve known her longer than I have,” Ellen answered flatly. “You should’ve known her better than I do.”

 

“I should have…” Regina agreed. “But you see, I didn’t even know she’s a Juilliard’s graduate.”

 

“That’s because you never asked her.”

 

Regina fell silent. Her friend was right. She never asked Portia. But, as she had said earlier, she didn’t know what to ask or what not to ask. Though she always tried to look cheerful and composed, truth is Regina was always shy and unsure whenever Portia's around. She didn’t know whether Portia considered her as a friend, or more… How do she make Portia to look at her and only her?

 

“Don’t ask me. You have to think about it yourself,” Ellen said.

 

Regina looked up and realized she had been thinking out loud. “I guess so,” she said thoughtfully. “I have to do something that can impress her. So that I’ll be different from other people.”

 

Ellen didn’t spill any comments.

 

“I’m not the only person who’s trying to approach her, you know?” Regina asked.

 

“Mm… I know that,” Ellen mumbled.

 

“You do?”

 

“She often gets phone calls,” Ellen said. “From men and women, I think. She said all of them are her friends.”

 

“Well, you see?” Regina spread her hands widely with fiery eyes. “That’s the problem. I have to move fast.”

 

“Good luck.”

 

Regina pouted for a while and then she shook her head. “Ah, I’ll think about the way later.” She took a gulp of her orange juice and then looked back to Ellen. “So what are you gonna do tonight?”

 

Ellen shrugged. “I don’t know. Finishing my songs, perhaps.”

 

“Oh? You already got your inspiration?”

 

“I think I can produce one whole new album with all these songs in the back of my mind now.”

 

“Wow, your wrist is sprained and you suddenly got your inspiration. Maybe you should injure your hands more,” Regina joked and laughed.

 

“Very funny,” Ellen replied flatly.

 

Regina inhaled deeply and blew it. She slapped her thighs then said, “Alright then, I have to go now. I have to mull over the words I need to say to tell her about my feelings.”

 

Ellen was stunned, then she stared at Regina. “You’re gonna tell her? Tonight?”

 

“Of course,” Regina said firmly. “How long do you think I have to wait? I have to do it before anybody else does.”

 

Ellen didn’t say anything. She just took another bite of her apple. 

 

Regina shrugged. “Who knows Portia might give me a shot?”

 

“Mm, who knows?” Ellen mumbled.

 

Regina stood up and walked to the door. “Wish me luck tonight,” she said cheerfully.

 

She opened the door and stepped outside without waiting for any answers from her friend.

 

And without realizing that her friend didn’t answer at all.