Begin Again: Chapter 15

“Where’s your ring?” 

Portia turns around and glares disapprovingly at Nic who’s sitting next to her on the dining table, then she glances at Andrew who’s answering her mom’s question and Michael who’s talking to Jenna, Andrew’s wife. She sighs in relief to see that none of her brothers heard Nic’s question. She's started to regret her decision to bring that friend of hers to the family dinner at her mom’s apartment. Nic happened to be at Portia’s shop when Michael came to pick her up. Since their families have known each other for a long time, Portia invited Nic to come with them. And now she regrets her decision because Nic keeps on asking about Ellen DeGeneres and Portia really doesn’t want her brothers to find out about it just yet. 

“So where’s your damn ring?” Nic asks again. 

“Shut up,” Portia growls in response, “before I put one whole tomato inside your mouth.” 

Nic rolls his eyes dramatically. “Fine,” he sighs, “but where’s your ring?” 

Portia grips her fork tightly and takes a deep breath to calm herself down. 

“Anyway, I hope you guys can spare some time this Saturday,” Portia’s mom says in all of a sudden to everybody. 

“What’s on Saturday?” Andrew asks. 

“My good friend, Betty DeGeneres— she came to your wedding, and I hope you all still remember her— invited us to dinner at the Ramses on Saturday,” Margaret explains. And then she looks at Nic and says, “Of course you’re coming with us, Nic.” 

“Oh, really? I would love that. Thank you so much!” Nic says excitedly. “I’m not gonna pass the chance to dine at the Ramses.” 

Andrew whistled. “Wow, finally we get a table there? I’m not gonna miss it either.”

Margaret turns to her daughter. “What about you, Portia? You can spare some time?” 

Portia nods. “Sure, no problem.” 

Her mom’s eyebrows shot up. “You don’t look as surprised as the others.” 

Portia clears her throat quietly. “Uhh… Ellen already told me.” 

“You saw her today?” her mom asks.

“Oh, no. She…” Portia hesitates. “She called.” 

“Oh?” Margaret Rogers mumbles and smiles. Michael looks at his mom and Portia alternately, then says, “Don’t tell me Mom agrees with Betty’s plan.” 

“What plan?” this time Andrew asks Michael. 

Portia groans internally. 

“It appears that Betty DeGeneres is planning to fix up her daughter with Portia,” Michael answers. 

“And who’s the daughter?” Andrew asks, frowning. 

“Ellen DeGeneres,” Michael says again. 

“That sounds kind of familiar.” 

“She’s the owner and the executive chef of Ramses. You met her, Andrew, at your wedding. Remember?” 

“Vaguely.” Andrew puts down his fork and leans to his chair. “What’s she like?” 

Nic instantly chimes in, “Quite tall, beautiful, short blonde hair, impeccable skin—according to my standard— and extremely gorgeous, gorgeous blue eyes that…. Ouch!” 

Portia doesn’t let go of her tiny pinch on Nic’s arm that Nic has to grab Portia’s hand and pulls it forcefully. They glare at each other for 2 seconds. 

“You’ve met her, Nic?” Michael asks, looking confused. 

Still with Portia’s hand in his to avoid Portia from launching any more physical attacks, Nic answers lightly, “Oh, yes. Portia took her to my parents’ restaurant for dinner after they watched a Broadway show. Isn’t that so, Portia?” 

Oh, Portia swears she’ll claw at that handsome face of Nic’s later. 

“I thought you didn’t like her, Portia,” her mom comments now.

“That’s what I said to her,” Michael chimes in. “But it seems like they’re alright.” 

“Wait a minute, wait a minute,” Andrew finally says while raising his hand. “I seem to be the only one here who knows nothing about this. Portia?” 

Portia sighs quietly and turns to her oldest brother. “Yes?”

“What’s your relationship with Ellen DeGeneres?”

“Nothing,” Portia says quickly. 

Nic snorts next to her but Portia ignores him. 

Andrew looks at her dubiously but doesn’t say anything more. Portia knows that her brother is still waiting for more explanation. 

“I mean we don’t have any special relationship going on,” Portia adds. “Her mom does want to fix us up, but it’s just not gonna work. I don’t….. She doesn’t….” Portia stops to take some breaths. “What I meant to say is that we’re just friends.” 

“So now you’re friends?” her mom asks with an innocent smile. 

“Well…” Portia shrugs indifferently. “I guess so.” 

“Friends,” Andrew mumbles and grabs his fork again. “I think Michael and I are still gonna have to talk to her.” 

Michael nods in agreement, Portia rolls her eyes, and their mom chuckles. 

Jenna, who had been listening in silence, laughs and says, “I still remember how Michael and Portia ‘talked to me’ the first time Andrew brought me to the family dinner.” 

Nic winces. “I think it’s tradition,” he says. “I also remember how Andrew ‘talked to me’ when I picked up Portia for prom. I almost backed up right then.” 

Andrew laughed. “It was only for precaution, Nic. And it’s before I found out that you’re not 'a threat',” he says. “But you should be grateful since what you experienced was nothing compared to the usual ones.” 

Nic looks at him in surprise. “Ha! Nothing compared to the usual ones! So Portia’s future girlfriend is going to be tortured even more.” 

“Oh, yes,” Michael says. “Weak people aren’t worthy of Portia.”

Nic thinks for a while then says, “Well, Ellen DeGeneres doesn’t look weak to me.” 

Portia squints her eyes at Nic. She’s about to say something when her phone rings. She quickly gets up and walks towards the living room. It could be Ellen since she said that she’s gonna call her again. 

Oh, no. Not Ellen. She frowns seeing an unknown number appears on the screen. “Hello?” 

“Hey, Portia.” 

That voice makes Portia holds her breath for a split second. She doesn’t understand how Francesca Gregorini can make her heart beats faster only by saying her name. Portia glances at her family who’s still eating and chatting, then she quickly slips into her mom’s bedroom so her conversation won't be overheard from the dining room. 

“Hi, Fran,” she says after closing the door. “What’s up?”

“Am I interrupting something?”

“No, no. Not at all,” Portia quickly says. “I was just having dinner with my family.” 

“Oh, perhaps I shouldn’t hold you too long then,” Francesca says. “A friend of mine who works for a famous designer— I forgot the name— invited me to a party that they’re holding tomorrow night. She said I can come with a friend. So, would you be willing to go with me?” 

Portia answers without any hesitation, “Of course.” 

“Great.” Francesca sounds satisfied. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow.” 

Portia has just ended the call when Nic’s head appears from behind the bedroom’s door. “Hey, Port. You’re missing from the dining table. What are you doing here?” 

Portia smiles apologetically and shows her phone. “Receiving a phone call.” 

“From Ellen?” Nic asks and steps inside. 

Portia shakes her head. “Francesca,” she corrects her friend. 

Nic looks at her disapprovingly. Of course Nic knows who Francesca is and what’s her role in Portia’s life. Nic is the only person who knows about their relationship back then. Nic is also the very first person that Portia called soon as she knew that Francesca is back in New York. 

“So what did she want?” Nic asks.

“She asked me to go with her to a party tomorrow.” 

“And you said yes?” 

Portia nods. 

Nic sighs. “I’ve said it many times and I’ll say it again right now; you’re making things too easy for her, honey.” 

Portia waves her hand, but she knows that Nic is right. It took a long time for her to admit that fact since Nic told her for the first time many years ago. Portia and Francesca’s relationship is not a balanced one. Portia was the one who liked Francesca first, then she was the one who mustered the courage to tell Fran, and then she was also the one who wanted to get engaged before Fran left for South Africa. 

Not wanting to think about those embarrassing facts, Portia takes Nic’s hand and pulls him towards the door. “Let’s go back to the dining room. And, Nic,” she says with a serious voice, “please stop talking about Ellen DeGeneres in front of my brothers before I lose my temper and stabs your arm with a fork.” 

“But—“

Nic sighs dramatically. “Oh, fine. Whatever you say.” He’s silent for a moment, then adds, “but where’s your ring?” 

Portia groans exasperatedly, playfully hits Nic’s arm, then pushes him out of the room. 

***********

She’s not waiting for Ellen to call her. Of course not. Portia hasn’t gone to sleep even though the clock shows that it’s a little past midnight. But she hasn’t gone to sleep because she’s watching a funny TV show. It’s so entertaining and that’s why she insists on watching the show while lying on the couch even though she has yawned countless times. 

Yep. That’s definitely the reason. Not because she’s waiting for a phone call from… Oh! 

Portia jolts when her phone rings. She sits up straight and grabs her phone from the table. The name that shows up on the screen makes her smile. She taps on the green button and brings the phone to her right ear. “Hello?”

“Hey, it’s late. Why aren’t you sleeping?” Ellen asks straight away. Her voice sounds exhausted but still cheerful as usual. 

“I’m watching a hilarious show,” Portia answers while reaching for the remote and turns the TV off. 

“Not because you’re waiting for me to call you?” Ellen jokes.

Portia sneers, puts on her fluffy slippers and walks towards her bedroom. “Definitely not.” 

Ellen laughs and Portia subconsciously smiles. 

“How’s your mom doing? Your brothers?” 

“They’re all doing great. Thanks for asking.” 

“By the way,” Ellen says, “you’re not mad at me?” 

“Why should I be mad at you?” Portia asks back. She climbs into her bed and slips underneath the blanket.

“This Saturday.” 

“Ah.” Portia understands. “Your mom’s invitation?” 

Ellen mumbles a yes. 

Portia plays with the edge of the blanket and says, “No, I’m not mad. Your mom already told my mom, and my mom told us today. Andrew and Michael are very excited to have dinner at the Ramses.” 

“Really? Why, then, I’m gonna have to do my best to impress my soon-to-be brothers in law.” 

“Brothers in law my ass,” Portia grumbles. “Anyway, you also have to know that Andrew and Michael found out about your mom’s plan to… you know… for us to… you know what I mean.” 

“You mean for us to get married and have lots of sex and perhaps adopt lots of kids to be her grandchildren?” 

“Oh, for god’s sake! Do you really have to say it out loud like that?” Portia grumbles, her cheeks are growing red rapidly. The prospect of spending the rest of her life with Ellen makes her blush somehow. 

Ellen laughs. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry. I was just playing. So how did your brothers take the news?” 

“I can't say that they’re very happy about it,” Portia says calmly. “And even though I’ve told them that we’re just friends, I think they’re still going to hold you for questioning when they see you.” 

“Oh, really?” 

“Yes. So it’d be advisable for you to not say random things like you usually do.” 

“Not that,” Ellen cuts her off. “I mean, are we really friends now?” 

Portia’s answer doesn’t come up instantly. She looks down at her finger that's tracing the pattern of the blanket for a while. Then she sighs quietly and mumbles, “I guess so.” 

Silence for a couple seconds, then Ellen says, “It’s good to hear that.” 

**********

Ellen can’t hold herself back from smiling once she hears that Portia sees her as a friend now. That’s the greatest news that she has heard this week. She dialed Portia’s number right after she got to her apartment because she has promised to call her again and because she also wants to talk to that girl. 

Ellen sits on the edge of her bed for a couple seconds, in loss of words, before finally finding her voice back and says, “It’s good to hear that.” 

Portia mumbles something indistinct on the other end. 

Not wanting for the situation to be awkward, Ellen quickly adds, “Especially after you told Audrey that we’re not friends.” 

“Audrey?” Portia’s voice sounds confused. 

“Pretty, tall, redhead. You met her during the art exhibition,” Ellen says. “And I’m pretty sure she dropped by your shop today.” 

“Oh, yes. Audrey. Yes. I remember. Yeah, she did come to my shop. How did you know?” 

“She told me.” 

“Oh.” 

“So why did you tell her that we’re not friends?” 

Portia clicks her tongue and Ellen can sense her reluctance. Finally the girl gives up. “Fine, I’ll tell you. I was asked to ask you about when are you going to propose to her. That’s why I told her that we’re not friends. I mean we’re not that close that I can mix myself up in that kind of…. private things. And besides….” 

“Whoa, wait a minute,” Ellen interrupts Portia’s train of words. Her brow furrows in confusion. “She asked you to ask me when am I going to propose to her?” 

“Well, actually it was her friend who wanted me to ask you, but that’s not the point,” Portia says. “The point is that they really think it’s about damn time you proposed to…. Audrey.” 

“But… I’m never going to propose to her,” Ellen says honestly. “That’s not the nature of our relationship. We’re just good friends. She knows that.” 

“Are you sure that she knows?” Portia asks dubiously. 

“She knows,” Ellen states firmly. “I’ve never done anything that would make her think otherwise.” 

“Well, if you’re sure…” Portia says indifferently. 

“We’re just friends,” Ellen says it one more time. She lies down on her bed, staring at the ceiling and smiling to herself. “And besides, how could I propose to her when I already have a fiancée?” 

Portia gasps exaggeratedly. “Oh, you do? Oh my god. How come I didn’t know?” 

Ellen burst out laughing. “Yes. Believe it or not, my mother chose her for me and I’m not complaining at all.” 

Portia snorts but doesn’t say anything. 

“Alright,” Ellen says and sits up straight again on her bed. “It’s past midnight. You should go to sleep.” 

“Hey, Ellen?”

“Yes?” 

“I hope you won’t mind, but my mom also asked Nic to come to the Ramses this Saturday. He happened to be with us tonight, and he’s like family to us, so…” 

“Sure. No problem at all,” Ellen says lightly. 

Silence, then Portia mutters, “I’m sorry.” 

“For what?” Ellen asks confusedly. 

“For yesterday. I shouldn’t have done that.”

Ah, Ellen understands. Portia is talking about their little argument back in the cab yesterday night. “You don’t have to be sorry,” Ellen says sincerely. “I already forgot about the whole thing, in fact.” 

“You’re right,” Portia goes on, ignoring Ellen’s words. “Nic’s gay.” 

Ellen doesn’t say anything. She wants to let the girl talk. 

“He hasn’t come out to anyone yet.”

“I understand,” Ellen mumbles. “And that’s why from time to time he’d ask you to play his girlfriend? So no one will suspect?” 

“Yeah. I don’t really understand why he insists on staying closeted, if you know what I mean. Most people who pay enough attention usually find out in a minute. Andrew and Michael did. My mom did. Even you did.” 

“Yes. But I’m sure it’s him who has the final decision whether to come out or not. Because it’s his life, you know. We’re lucky that our family and friends are widely accepting and supportive. Not everybody is as accepting as our closest ones are. And you, as his friend, only have to let him know that you’ve got his back, whatever his choice would be.” 

Silence again. Then Portia mumbles, “You really have changed.” 

Ellen smiles a little. “Well. It appears so.” 

“Thank you.” 

Feeling a little awkward, Ellen clears her throat and says, “You don’t have to worry. Nic’s secret is safe with me. But I guess he should try to find someone else to help him from now on.” 

“Huh?” 

“Obviously I don’t want my fiancée to be introduced as some other guy’s girlfriend,” Ellen continues with a firm and dignified tone. “That being said, Nicholas Li has got to find another fake girlfriend. Understood?” 

Ellen expects the girl to grumble and say that she’s not her fiancée, as usual. But this time she’s wrong. This time Portia only laughs it off and says, “Good night, Ellen.” 

“Good night, Portia.” 

Ellen waits until the girl hangs up before she lowers the phone from her ear and grins like an idiot.