“Thanks for the ride,” Portia says to Francesca once she stops her car in front of Portia’s apartment. “And thanks for having dinner with me despite still having to work after this.”
“You can give me a call anytime, Portia,” Fran says. “You know that.”
Portia smiles. “Well, good night.”
Portia gets off the car and instantly shivers. God, why is it so cold tonight? She quickly makes her way to the front door of the building.
“Portia.”
Portia turns around, stuffing her hands into her pockets. “Yeah?”
Francesca already got out of the car and is walking towards Portia. She stops right in front of the girl and asks, “Can I say goodnight to you the way I used to?”
Portia knows full-well what Francesca means by this and for a while, she can’t really come up with something to say. Perhaps it’s January’s cold wind that froze her brain this night.
But Francesca takes Portia’s silence as a yes since she’s started to slowly close her gap with her. Portia doesn’t move, letting Francesca stand right in front of her, their coats were touching.
She’s going to kiss me and I’m going to let her, Portia says to herself when she lifts up her head to see Francesca, because she kissed Audrey.
Francesca brings her right hand to Portia’s face and starts to go in for a kiss.
She’s going to kiss me and I’m going to let her.
I’m going to let her.
But, at the very last second, Portia slightly looks away, making Francesca’s lips land right on the edge of hers. Portia shuts her eyes and sighs internally. What has she done? Why did she do it? She only moves her face a little, but that’s still a refusal.
She’s sure that Francesca realizes it too, even though that woman doesn’t show it. Fran smiles at Portia, straightens her back and mumbles, “Good night.”
Portia can do nothing but to smile back clumsily. She waits until Francesca gets inside her car and goes away before she shuts her eyes and groans.
Damn Ellen DeGeneres.
“Finally, you’re back in the loop.”
The voice of the woman she just cursed makes Portia jumps. She turns and sees Ellen closing the door of her car, parked in front of her apartment.
“Ellen,” she says automatically as her heart starts to race.
Ellen stays where she is, stuffing her hands into her long coat’s pockets. She takes a deep breath before saying, “Your phone can’t be contacted.”
“I ran out of juice,” Portia says quickly and lightly. She wonders if Ellen saw what just happened.
Ellen stares at Portia for a while, then starts to make her way towards her. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” she says.
Portia shrugs. “Oh. I was with—“
“With Francesca, yes, I can see that,” Ellen cuts her off coldly. She looks away from Portia and Portia notices her clenching her jaw. It sort of confirms that Ellen did see what just took place. Well, good.
Portia starts to speak. “I—“
“You’re having fun with Francesca while everybody’s busy looking for you and try to reach you,” Ellen cuts her off again. She exhales and shakes her head. “But it’s not important. You better come with me now.”
Portia frowns. “Come with you? Why?” she asks. “And who did you mean by ‘everybody’?”
“Your brothers have been looking for you as well,” Ellen says curtly while walking back to her car. She opens the passenger’s door, indicating Portia to get in. “I’ll take you to them.”
Suddenly a heavy anxiousness falls upon Portia. “They’re looking for me? Why? What happened?” she says, finally walking towards Ellen.
And Portia swears that she sees Ellen’s face softens right at that moment, as well as her voice when she says, “Your mom’s in the hospital.”
*******************
Ellen takes her eyes off the road for a second to see the girl sitting next to her in the car. Portia’s face is as white as a ghost, her whole body is tensed and stiff, her left hand is gripping her phone tightly while she keeps on biting the nails of the right one. Ellen feels like she should stop Portia before that girl starts to make her own fingers bleed.
“Stop biting your nails,” Ellen mumbles, keeping her eyes on the road.
Portia doesn’t show any sign that she heard Ellen.
Ellen steals another glance, then extends her hand towards Portia’s, pulling it away from her lips. Portia jolts and turns to see Ellen.
“You'll hurt your fingers,” Ellen mumbles again, still holding Portia’s hand. She stares straight to the road ahead of her. “Don’t worry. Your mom is okay. You’ve talked to Andrew and he said that her condition is stable. She’s just tired.”
Portia gulps. “I shouldn’t have turned my phone off,” she whispers.
Ellen squeezes Portia’s hand reassuringly. “Your mom is okay,” she says again.
Portia looks away, staring out the window but doesn’t pull her hand away from Ellen’s grip. Instead, she squeezes Ellen’s hand back.
Upon arrival at the hospital, Portia wastes no time to scramble for her brothers who take her right away to their mother. Ellen doesn’t go in. She’s not family. So she looks around and decides to sit on one of the cold silver benches in the waiting room. She just picked up a magazine when Jenna, Andrew’s wife, approaches her.
“Thank you for driving Portia here,” Jenna says to Ellen. She moves her head towards the room where Portia’s mom is and asks, “You wanna go in there?”
Ellen shakes her head. “Thanks, but perhaps later. I’m sure it’s time for family now. I’ll just wait here.”
Jenna smiles and shrugs. “Alright. I’ll let Portia know that you’re waiting.”
15 minutes later, Portia gets out of the room. Ellen is relieved to see her not looking so pale anymore.
“How’s your mom doing?” Ellen asks after Portia stops in front of her.
Portia sighs and sits next to Ellen. “Quite well,” she says with a smile. “And very eager to go home.”
“That’s good news.” Ellen stares at Portia for a while. “And how are you doing?”
“Relieved,” she answers, exhaling. “Still feel bad that I didn’t come earlier.”
“I’m sorry,” Ellen mumbles.
Portia looks at her with raised eyebrows. “Not your fault.”
Ellen stays silent.
“Thanks so much for bringing me here,” Portia goes on, smiling again. “I’m gonna go home with my brothers later, so you can go home now if you want to, Ellen.”
“Anyway,” Ellen says, looking for something in her inner coat pocket, “I’ve got something to give to you. She pulls out two different envelopes and hands it to Portia. “From Arthur and Frank.”
Portia furrows her brow. “Who?”
“Read it.”
Portia looks hesitant, but takes both of the envelopes and chooses to tear open the white one first.
“Dear Portia,” Portia starts to read. She glances at Ellen, clears her throat, and continues, “In this given opportunity, I would like to sincerely apologize to you for all the horrible things I have ever done to you in high school, especially when I tripped you over in the hall and embarrassed you in front of everybody. Trust me, I’m extremely not proud of what I’ve done and I am truly sorry.” Portia grimaces. “As a sign of my earnest apology to you, I’m offering you my service as an architect if there ever comes a day where you need it. For free— it’s the least I could do. Warm greetings, Arthur Young.”
Portia looks at Ellen. “You’re the one who told him to write this?” she asks.
Ellen doesn’t answer. “There’s one more,” she says, pointing to the second envelope on Portia’s hand.
Portia squints her eyes, but tears open the yellow envelope anyway.
“Dear Portia,” she reads again. “I actually wanted to call you and say my apology to you directly, but Ellen refuses to give me your number and asks me to write this letter instead. I really hope that you will forgive every shitty thing that I have ever done to you back then. Since Ellen said that I have to offer you something as a sign of sincere apology, I have decided to come up with an offer to accompany you whenever you come to Chicago. Okay, fine. I’m just joking. Ellen doesn’t like this joke.” Portia snorts quietly and smiles. “So, I’m offering you a free lifetime membership for my gym center in Chicago. For free, of course. Frank. PS. I’d still go around with you if you eve.”
Portia raises her eyebrows when she realizes that the letter stops there. “I think he didn’t finish this letter,” she says as she turns the page, looking for a continuation.
Ellen shrugs. “I might have snatched the paper before he’s done,” she admits nonchalantly.
Portia burst out laughing and shakes her head.
Ellen observes the girl who’s sitting next to her, considering if she should say it now or if she should wait. Well, better say it now while she’s with her. So, Ellen takes a deep breath and says, “It’s not like what it looks like in that picture.”
Portia doesn’t say anything, doesn’t look her way either.
“Audrey was drunk and wasn’t aware of what she was doing,” Ellen goes on, hoping with all her heart that Portia believes her. “I didn’t kiss her.”
Portia still remains silent. But, just when Ellen starts to think that perhaps Portia’s lost in her thoughts and probably didn’t hear what she was saying, the girl turns to her and says, “I didn’t kiss Francesca either.”
*****************
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
Portia’s words keep on echoing in Ellen’s mind all night long, since she left the hospital, while she’s back working at the Ramses, until the moment she comes back to her apartment.
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
What does it mean? Ellen thinks to herself while taking off her coat and walks towards the window in her living room. Does it mean that Portia believes that she didn’t kiss Audrey? Or does it mean otherwise?
But does Ellen herself believe that Portia didn’t kiss Francesca?
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
That’s what Portia said. But, Ellen saw it with her own eyes when Francesca lowered her head to kiss Portia.
Ellen grits her teeth when the unpleasant memory provokes a pang of pain in her chest.
In that damned picture, Ellen was seen to be kissing Audrey. Very clearly. But it doesn’t mean that she did. “I didn’t kiss Audrey,” she mumbles to herself.
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
Does it mean that what she saw earlier isn’t what was actually taking place?
Ellen takes a deep breath. If she wants Portia to believe her, she also has to believe Portia. Maybe that’s what Portia tried to say.
She pulls out her phone from her pocket and sends a text to Portia. Asleep?
32 seconds pass by, then Portia’s reply comes in. Not yet. What’s up?
Ellen dials Portia’s number.
The girl picks up directly on the first ring. “Yes?”
“I believe you,” Ellen says with utmost sincerity.
A moment of silence, then, “I believe you, too.”
Ellen breathes out in full relief. “Thank you. So does it mean I get to receive the answer to my question?”
“What question?”
“Is there a chance for you to like me back and want to know me better?”
Ellen holds her breath for 8 seconds. A solid eight-second moment of anticipation before Portia’s voice is finally heard again.
“Yes,” Portia says, slowly but lightly. “I’d be very glad to get to know you better, Ellen DeGeneres.”
Ellen really can’t describe how she’s feeling right at that moment. She only knows that she can’t fight the idiotic grin that grows wider and wider, and that her heart is soaring so high. “You mean it, right?” she asks. “You know what this means?”
“Yes, I know.”
Ellen’s pretty sure that she can hear the smile in Portia’s voice as well. “I really hope I could crush you with a hug right now,” she mutters.
Portia giggles in response. “Well, I am hugging you right now. Can’t you feel it?”
Ellen raises her eyebrows and smiles. “You are? Well, then, I’m hugging you, too.”
Portia laughs. “Gosh, that’s so pathetically cheesy.”
The ensuing silence is a comfortable one, then Portia finally says, “It’s late and you must be exhausted. Go get some sleep.”
“You, too.”
“I’ll see you… tomorrow?”
Ellen smirks. “You better be damn sure I’m going to see you tomorrow, woman.”
“You can give me a call anytime, Portia,” Fran says. “You know that.”
Portia smiles. “Well, good night.”
Portia gets off the car and instantly shivers. God, why is it so cold tonight? She quickly makes her way to the front door of the building.
“Portia.”
Portia turns around, stuffing her hands into her pockets. “Yeah?”
Francesca already got out of the car and is walking towards Portia. She stops right in front of the girl and asks, “Can I say goodnight to you the way I used to?”
Portia knows full-well what Francesca means by this and for a while, she can’t really come up with something to say. Perhaps it’s January’s cold wind that froze her brain this night.
But Francesca takes Portia’s silence as a yes since she’s started to slowly close her gap with her. Portia doesn’t move, letting Francesca stand right in front of her, their coats were touching.
She’s going to kiss me and I’m going to let her, Portia says to herself when she lifts up her head to see Francesca, because she kissed Audrey.
Francesca brings her right hand to Portia’s face and starts to go in for a kiss.
She’s going to kiss me and I’m going to let her.
I’m going to let her.
But, at the very last second, Portia slightly looks away, making Francesca’s lips land right on the edge of hers. Portia shuts her eyes and sighs internally. What has she done? Why did she do it? She only moves her face a little, but that’s still a refusal.
She’s sure that Francesca realizes it too, even though that woman doesn’t show it. Fran smiles at Portia, straightens her back and mumbles, “Good night.”
Portia can do nothing but to smile back clumsily. She waits until Francesca gets inside her car and goes away before she shuts her eyes and groans.
Damn Ellen DeGeneres.
“Finally, you’re back in the loop.”
The voice of the woman she just cursed makes Portia jumps. She turns and sees Ellen closing the door of her car, parked in front of her apartment.
“Ellen,” she says automatically as her heart starts to race.
Ellen stays where she is, stuffing her hands into her long coat’s pockets. She takes a deep breath before saying, “Your phone can’t be contacted.”
“I ran out of juice,” Portia says quickly and lightly. She wonders if Ellen saw what just happened.
Ellen stares at Portia for a while, then starts to make her way towards her. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” she says.
Portia shrugs. “Oh. I was with—“
“With Francesca, yes, I can see that,” Ellen cuts her off coldly. She looks away from Portia and Portia notices her clenching her jaw. It sort of confirms that Ellen did see what just took place. Well, good.
Portia starts to speak. “I—“
“You’re having fun with Francesca while everybody’s busy looking for you and try to reach you,” Ellen cuts her off again. She exhales and shakes her head. “But it’s not important. You better come with me now.”
Portia frowns. “Come with you? Why?” she asks. “And who did you mean by ‘everybody’?”
“Your brothers have been looking for you as well,” Ellen says curtly while walking back to her car. She opens the passenger’s door, indicating Portia to get in. “I’ll take you to them.”
Suddenly a heavy anxiousness falls upon Portia. “They’re looking for me? Why? What happened?” she says, finally walking towards Ellen.
And Portia swears that she sees Ellen’s face softens right at that moment, as well as her voice when she says, “Your mom’s in the hospital.”
*******************
Ellen takes her eyes off the road for a second to see the girl sitting next to her in the car. Portia’s face is as white as a ghost, her whole body is tensed and stiff, her left hand is gripping her phone tightly while she keeps on biting the nails of the right one. Ellen feels like she should stop Portia before that girl starts to make her own fingers bleed.
“Stop biting your nails,” Ellen mumbles, keeping her eyes on the road.
Portia doesn’t show any sign that she heard Ellen.
Ellen steals another glance, then extends her hand towards Portia’s, pulling it away from her lips. Portia jolts and turns to see Ellen.
“You'll hurt your fingers,” Ellen mumbles again, still holding Portia’s hand. She stares straight to the road ahead of her. “Don’t worry. Your mom is okay. You’ve talked to Andrew and he said that her condition is stable. She’s just tired.”
Portia gulps. “I shouldn’t have turned my phone off,” she whispers.
Ellen squeezes Portia’s hand reassuringly. “Your mom is okay,” she says again.
Portia looks away, staring out the window but doesn’t pull her hand away from Ellen’s grip. Instead, she squeezes Ellen’s hand back.
Upon arrival at the hospital, Portia wastes no time to scramble for her brothers who take her right away to their mother. Ellen doesn’t go in. She’s not family. So she looks around and decides to sit on one of the cold silver benches in the waiting room. She just picked up a magazine when Jenna, Andrew’s wife, approaches her.
“Thank you for driving Portia here,” Jenna says to Ellen. She moves her head towards the room where Portia’s mom is and asks, “You wanna go in there?”
Ellen shakes her head. “Thanks, but perhaps later. I’m sure it’s time for family now. I’ll just wait here.”
Jenna smiles and shrugs. “Alright. I’ll let Portia know that you’re waiting.”
15 minutes later, Portia gets out of the room. Ellen is relieved to see her not looking so pale anymore.
“How’s your mom doing?” Ellen asks after Portia stops in front of her.
Portia sighs and sits next to Ellen. “Quite well,” she says with a smile. “And very eager to go home.”
“That’s good news.” Ellen stares at Portia for a while. “And how are you doing?”
“Relieved,” she answers, exhaling. “Still feel bad that I didn’t come earlier.”
“I’m sorry,” Ellen mumbles.
Portia looks at her with raised eyebrows. “Not your fault.”
Ellen stays silent.
“Thanks so much for bringing me here,” Portia goes on, smiling again. “I’m gonna go home with my brothers later, so you can go home now if you want to, Ellen.”
“Anyway,” Ellen says, looking for something in her inner coat pocket, “I’ve got something to give to you. She pulls out two different envelopes and hands it to Portia. “From Arthur and Frank.”
Portia furrows her brow. “Who?”
“Read it.”
Portia looks hesitant, but takes both of the envelopes and chooses to tear open the white one first.
“Dear Portia,” Portia starts to read. She glances at Ellen, clears her throat, and continues, “In this given opportunity, I would like to sincerely apologize to you for all the horrible things I have ever done to you in high school, especially when I tripped you over in the hall and embarrassed you in front of everybody. Trust me, I’m extremely not proud of what I’ve done and I am truly sorry.” Portia grimaces. “As a sign of my earnest apology to you, I’m offering you my service as an architect if there ever comes a day where you need it. For free— it’s the least I could do. Warm greetings, Arthur Young.”
Portia looks at Ellen. “You’re the one who told him to write this?” she asks.
Ellen doesn’t answer. “There’s one more,” she says, pointing to the second envelope on Portia’s hand.
Portia squints her eyes, but tears open the yellow envelope anyway.
“Dear Portia,” she reads again. “I actually wanted to call you and say my apology to you directly, but Ellen refuses to give me your number and asks me to write this letter instead. I really hope that you will forgive every shitty thing that I have ever done to you back then. Since Ellen said that I have to offer you something as a sign of sincere apology, I have decided to come up with an offer to accompany you whenever you come to Chicago. Okay, fine. I’m just joking. Ellen doesn’t like this joke.” Portia snorts quietly and smiles. “So, I’m offering you a free lifetime membership for my gym center in Chicago. For free, of course. Frank. PS. I’d still go around with you if you eve.”
Portia raises her eyebrows when she realizes that the letter stops there. “I think he didn’t finish this letter,” she says as she turns the page, looking for a continuation.
Ellen shrugs. “I might have snatched the paper before he’s done,” she admits nonchalantly.
Portia burst out laughing and shakes her head.
Ellen observes the girl who’s sitting next to her, considering if she should say it now or if she should wait. Well, better say it now while she’s with her. So, Ellen takes a deep breath and says, “It’s not like what it looks like in that picture.”
Portia doesn’t say anything, doesn’t look her way either.
“Audrey was drunk and wasn’t aware of what she was doing,” Ellen goes on, hoping with all her heart that Portia believes her. “I didn’t kiss her.”
Portia still remains silent. But, just when Ellen starts to think that perhaps Portia’s lost in her thoughts and probably didn’t hear what she was saying, the girl turns to her and says, “I didn’t kiss Francesca either.”
*****************
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
Portia’s words keep on echoing in Ellen’s mind all night long, since she left the hospital, while she’s back working at the Ramses, until the moment she comes back to her apartment.
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
What does it mean? Ellen thinks to herself while taking off her coat and walks towards the window in her living room. Does it mean that Portia believes that she didn’t kiss Audrey? Or does it mean otherwise?
But does Ellen herself believe that Portia didn’t kiss Francesca?
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
That’s what Portia said. But, Ellen saw it with her own eyes when Francesca lowered her head to kiss Portia.
Ellen grits her teeth when the unpleasant memory provokes a pang of pain in her chest.
In that damned picture, Ellen was seen to be kissing Audrey. Very clearly. But it doesn’t mean that she did. “I didn’t kiss Audrey,” she mumbles to herself.
I didn’t kiss Francesca either.
Does it mean that what she saw earlier isn’t what was actually taking place?
Ellen takes a deep breath. If she wants Portia to believe her, she also has to believe Portia. Maybe that’s what Portia tried to say.
She pulls out her phone from her pocket and sends a text to Portia. Asleep?
32 seconds pass by, then Portia’s reply comes in. Not yet. What’s up?
Ellen dials Portia’s number.
The girl picks up directly on the first ring. “Yes?”
“I believe you,” Ellen says with utmost sincerity.
A moment of silence, then, “I believe you, too.”
Ellen breathes out in full relief. “Thank you. So does it mean I get to receive the answer to my question?”
“What question?”
“Is there a chance for you to like me back and want to know me better?”
Ellen holds her breath for 8 seconds. A solid eight-second moment of anticipation before Portia’s voice is finally heard again.
“Yes,” Portia says, slowly but lightly. “I’d be very glad to get to know you better, Ellen DeGeneres.”
Ellen really can’t describe how she’s feeling right at that moment. She only knows that she can’t fight the idiotic grin that grows wider and wider, and that her heart is soaring so high. “You mean it, right?” she asks. “You know what this means?”
“Yes, I know.”
Ellen’s pretty sure that she can hear the smile in Portia’s voice as well. “I really hope I could crush you with a hug right now,” she mutters.
Portia giggles in response. “Well, I am hugging you right now. Can’t you feel it?”
Ellen raises her eyebrows and smiles. “You are? Well, then, I’m hugging you, too.”
Portia laughs. “Gosh, that’s so pathetically cheesy.”
The ensuing silence is a comfortable one, then Portia finally says, “It’s late and you must be exhausted. Go get some sleep.”
“You, too.”
“I’ll see you… tomorrow?”
Ellen smirks. “You better be damn sure I’m going to see you tomorrow, woman.”
Yeees! worth the wait. 3 update and it's so cool. Thanks, you just made my day)
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